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GeneralBarbie and its Relationship to Early Hominids

29th Nov 2017 14:04 UTCKim Macdonald

This was found as an article download in the backblocks of the Otago Rock and Mineral Club New Zealand website. Unfortunately it is not referenced, however most on the site relate to New Zealand mineral magazines several decades old. It refers to a Mr Williams ( I have chosen not to list the full name), and his relationship with the Smithsonian Institute, where he would send to them various finds from his backyard.

Dear Mr Williams,

Thankyou for your latest submission to the institute labelled '93211-D, layer seven, next to clothesline post..hominid skull' . We have given careful and detailed examination, and regret to inform you that we disagree with your theory that it represents conclusive proof of the presence of early man in the Charleston County two million years ago. Rather, it appears that what you have found is the head of a barbie doll, of the variety that one of our staff, who has small children, believes to be 'Malibu Barbie'.

We feel there are a number of physical attributes which might have tipped you off to its modern origin:

1) the material is moulded plastic rather than fossilised bone.

2) the cranial capacity of the specimen is approximately 9 cubic centimetres, well below the threshold of even the earliest identified proto-hominid.

3) the skull does not support your theory as to a ravenous man eating Pliocene hominid roaming wetlands during this time.

This latest finding is one of the most intriguing hypotheses you have submitted in your history with this institution.

29th Nov 2017 14:09 UTCUwe Kolitsch Manager

ROTFL.

29th Nov 2017 20:35 UTCPaul Brandes 🌟 Manager

Oh my.....

29th Nov 2017 21:26 UTCMike Jensen

Just a slightly reworked version of the Smithsonian Barbie Hoax:

https://www.snopes.com/humor/letters/smithsonian.asp